1 Corinthians 7:1-9

Dedicated to Sexual Purity

Open your Bible to…

1Cor. 6:19 Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own?

1Cor. 6:20 For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s.

Pray

Intro

√ Dedicated to sexual purity

Guess what we’re going to talk about this morning?

Yep, sex.

I just want to go on record as saying it’s not my fault!

Blame it on the Corinthians, or God, but please recognize that I’m just the messenger boy!

And if you think it’s uncomfortable to listen to what God has to say on the subject put yourself in my sandals ~ it’s even more difficult to talk about week after week!

Before we get any further though I better define the title of my sermon…

“Dedicated to sexual purity”

I don’t mean abstinence, though that is certainly part of sexual purity.

Rather, what I mean by sexual purity is having God’s perspective on human sexuality and following His instructions regarding the expression of our sex drive.

Remember, He invented sex so it is a good and godly desire, but as we’ve seen in our study of Corinthians the sex drive is easily corrupted leading to sexual immorality.

So, as we begin chapter 7 it might be helpful to recall that chapter 6 ended with Paul’s exhortation to…

“Flee sexual immorality” ~ vs. 18

And his reminder that our bodies now belong to the Lord who purchased them with His own life!

Therefore, we ought to use our bodies for His glory and not for sexual immorality.

So we find that the first section of chapter 7 deals with the proper and godly parameters in which Christians can engage in sexual relationships.

Ap. Please listen!

The Church has a bad reputation for not dealing with this issue!

In fact, to such an extent that most people ~ Christian and unbelievers ~ have no idea what the Bible has to say on the topic of sex.

It’s my opinion that much of the confusion today among Christians about sexual orientation, the unbiblical doctrines being promoted in the Church that justify sin, and the large number of Christians living in disobedience to God’s will are the result of skipping over this important topic.

So, if you find yourself uncomfortable with the topic, or convicted because you’re not following God’s word please don’t tune me out…

…instead please listen to what the Bible says and change your behavior to match God’s word. If you do you and your spouse will be blessed.

Privilege of Marriage (vs. 1-2)

1Cor. 7:1 Now concerning the things of which you wrote to me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman.

1Cor. 7:2 Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband.

√ Privilege of marriage

Vs. 1 reminds us that Paul’s letter to the Corinthians is in part a response to a letter written to him by his friends at Corinth…

“Now concerning the things of which you wrote to me”

One of the issues for which they sought clarification was God’s view on sex.

Thus we find Paul in chapters 5-7 dealing with what is moral vs. what is immoral, what is godly vs. ungodly.

Remember, the people to whom he was writing were raised in, and living in, a culture in which there were few restrictions on sex!

In fact, 14 of the first 15 Roman Emperors were either homosexual or bisexual!

In fact, Nero, the Emperor at the time of Paul’s writing was set to marry a slave boy (Sporus/Sabinna) ~ the only thing odd about it in that society was the formality of the wedding!

So, the example set by the highest human authority of the day was one of unrestrained sexual exploitation.

No wonder the Christians at Corinth weren’t sure what was right and what was wrong so they asked!

(That’s a great idea – if you don’t know – ask!)

Note Paul’s first response…

“It is good for a man not to touch a woman.”

That’s a little awkward, the NLT translates it this way…

“Now about the questions you asked in your letter. Yes, it is good to live a celibate life.”

Before you recoil and reject what Paul’s writing let’s put his comments in context. Look at vs. 26-27…

“I suppose therefore that this is good because of the present distress—that it is good for a man to remain as he is.”

But even if you do marry, you have not sinned; and if a virgin marries, she has not sinned. Nevertheless such will have trouble in the flesh, but I would spare you.

That is, Paul is reminding his friends that in view of the rising persecution against Christians it would be better to remain single than to risk the possibility of dragging your wife and children into the arena.

Ex. Nero’s persecution of the Church

Nero, the Emperor at the time of Paul’s writing, was the first Roman Emperor to officially persecute Christians.

Persecution had not yet begun, but the signs of trouble were all around.

Both Paul and Peter would later be killed in the persecutions of Nero.

So, in view of the coming crisis Paul advised Christians to remain single so that they could face it without worrying about the impact it would have on a wife and children.

Ap. Not a general command of God

So, you singles can relax because Paul’s comments in vs. 1 are not a commandment of God to remain single!

√ Marriage

Paul recognized that many (probably most) of his friends at Corinth would find it near impossible to remain single so he writes…

“Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband.” ~ vs. 2

In other words, if they couldn’t remain single and abstinent then they should get married so as not to continually fall into sexual sin.

Before we move on let’s look at Paul’s instructions in vs. 2 because it’s full of insight into God’s plan for sexual expression.

First, note that God limits sex to married couples!

“Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband.”

He didn’t write…

“Let each man have a steady girlfriend, and let each woman have her own boy-toy”.

The point is that Paul reaffirms God’s perfect plan for sex…

It is the privilege of married people!

The reason is that sex as God intended is only blessed in the environment of commitment and trust.

Without those two ingredients there will never be true intimacy.

Note also that Paul defines marriage as the union of one man and one woman…

“…let each man (singular) have his own wife (singular), and let each woman (singular) have her own husband (singular).”

He’s specific in his definition of marriage and leaves no room for Christians to redefine marriage as anything other than the divinely inspired union of a man and a woman.

Ap. Christians and sex

So, let’s make sure that we understand the application of God’s word regarding sex…

If you aren’t married then it is God’s will that you not engage in sex.

If you are married it’s God’s will that you enjoy sex with your spouse only.

There’s no gray area open for personal interpretation – God is very clear about His will.

If you obey God you’ll be blessed.

If you disobey God you won’t be blessed.

Ex. Secular science

Read the reports by psychologists and sociologists and you’ll discover that even secular science reports that people involved in a monogamous marriage are…

Healthier, happier, live longer, experience less abuse and psychosis, etc., than those who cohabitate.

Don’t sell out God’s perfect plan for your life for the World’s cheap imitation of “love”.

Motivated by Love (vs. 3-6)

1Cor. 7:3 Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband.

1Cor. 7:4 The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.

1Cor. 7:5 Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

1Cor. 7:6 But I say this as a concession, not as a commandment.

√ Motivated by love

So, now that the Corinthians understood that marriage is the moral and godly setting for sex, Paul now provides them with the godly perspective on sex within marriage…

…specifically, that sex should be motivated by love not lust.

Remember the context of Paul’s letter.

He’s just finished dealing with sexual immorality in the church in the previous chapter.

Specifically he told the Christians at Corinth that sex with the temple prostitutes or anyone other than your spouse was immoral.

I don’t know much about prostitutes but I think we can safely conclude that a person engaged in sex with one is only concerned about themselves!

The point? Immoral sex is all about lust, not love!

Well the Christians in Corinth who had been involved in sexual immorality were now going to need some retraining on the right perspective for sexual relationships.

That is that from God’s perspective sex isn’t supposed to be self-centered and motivated by lust…

…rather as He designed it sex is supposed to be a ministry of mutual love to one another!

Paul’s comments are a radical departure from 1^st Century thought and a knife in the heart of Bible critics who falsely claim that he was a chauvinist, or worse a hater of woman!

More on that in a minute, let’s first look Paul’s instructions for a healthy marriage relationship.

Sex within a Christian marriage is…

1) A divine duty

First he reminds married Christians that they have a divine duty to love their partner ~ in context remember he’s talking about physical affection…

“Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband.” ~ vs. 3

In other words part of our duty as a married person is to satisfy our spouse’s desire for affection.

Guys, please note that both the husband and the wife are equally responsible for pleasing the other.

That is, it’s not just her obligation to satisfy your raging testosterone…

…it is first your job to make sure that your wife receives all the affection she is due.

And that isn’t just sex!

Physical affection that woman want is expressed in snuggle time, holding hands as you walk together, maybe brushing her hair, or a real hug that isn’t a prelude to sex…just a hug that says “you’re my favorite person on the planet.”

So men, God puts the burden of displaying affection on our shoulders.

We’re called to initiate affection and when we take care of our responsibility your wife will respond.

So, God’s first instruction to married couples is that both the husband and wife must make sure that they’re satisfying one another’s need for affection.

2) A divine reason

The reason that husbands and wives are to make sure that their spouse is satisfied is that by marriage they have a right to one another’s body!

“The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.” ~ vs. 4

At the heart of Paul’s instructions here is the very foundation of our faith, that is, as followers of Jesus we’re called to put other’s needs before our own.

Normally we apply that principle to just about every other part of our life except…

…physical intimacy.

But Paul reminds Christian couples that to live an others-centered life includes the way we view our sexual relationship with our spouse.

Ap. Christians ~ love your spouse!

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve done pre-marriage counseling for a couple who couldn’t keep their hands off each other!

Both the guy and the gal couldn’t wait for their wedding day and God’s go-ahead to consummate their love for one another.

But later that same couple comes to me complaining that one or the other partner is no longer interested in sex ~ and by the way it’s just about evenly split between men and woman!

There are many reasons why a person’s passion for their spouse may wane, but we don’t have the time to go into all that.

So, let me suggest that if you as a couple aren’t finding satisfaction in your love life that you make it a point to get educated on what the Bible suggests to reignite your passion (see notes for book references.)

The bottom line is that in a Christian marriage each partner belongs to the other!

Ap. Equal partners

One more important point before we move on and that is how Paul exalts the place of woman to equal status with men in the marriage relationship! Note vs. 4 again…

“The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.

That one sentence would have sent shock waves all through the Roman Empire of the 1^st Century!

That’s because in most if not all cultures of the ancient world it was the man who enjoyed full legal recognition while woman were often thought of as property.

With the exception of a handful of wealthy ladies women had few rights.

Husbands could divorce a wife without cause and deny her compensation.

In general woman were considered 2^nd class citizens.

Yet, we find Paul inspired by the Holy Spirit lifting woman to equal status with men in the marriage relationship!

That with regard to providing affection that a wife had just as much right to her husband’s body as he did to hers!

Unheard of in that day!

My point, don’t let anyone tell you that the apostle Paul, or the Bible in general, subjugates woman! Rather, the Christian Gospel is the great equalizer of humanity!

3) A divine instruction

Paul’s final instruction to married couples is that they should not deny one another the joy of intimacy unless it was mutually agreed upon…

…and then only for a short period of time for the purpose of seeking the Lord.

“Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”

Vs. 5

The reason for Paul’s advise here is two-fold…

First ~ to remove any excuses that a Christian might use as justification for denying their partner the affection they are due.

We are after all given to being selfish and that trait is often at the root of why husbands or wives withhold affection from one another.

So, Paul makes it clear that any decision to not have sex must be a mutual choice.

Second ~ to put parameters on the length of time that a couple might agree upon to deny themselves the joy of intimacy.

The reason, so that neither the husband nor wife could hide behind false spirituality as the reason for not providing the other with the affection the other was due.

Something like…

“Oh honey you know how much I’d enjoy making love to you, but I’ve made a vow to the Lord not to partake of love until He returns.”

Paul says that won’t fly and it isn’t spiritual to deny one another unless it’s a mutually agreed upon decision and then only for a limited time!

Ap. God created us as sexual beings

Western Christianity has suffered under a false sense of spirituality that makes sex out to be sinful or bad.

Probably due to the influence of the first European settlers in the US who brought over their Victorian era Christianity and Puritan roots.

But, that’s not a Biblical view of sex, after all it was God who said…

“Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it…” Gen. 1:28

The point is that men and woman have been wired by God to desire one another.

Unfortunately when sin entered the world one of the results is that the good and godly sex drive that He gave us was corrupted.

That corruption is seen in all of the bazaar behaviors that people are attracted to, and in the exploitation of sex in advertizing and the so-called sex industry.

It’s also manifest in the problems that couples experience where it seems like you’re never on the same page as a couple.

Here’s the point…

If you’re married and healthy then sex should be a normal and regular part of your joyful married life.

If it’s not then you need to talk to one another, do a Bible study together on the subject, and pray that God restores your passion for one another.

Freedom to Chose (vs. 7-9)

1Cor. 7:7 For I wish that all men were even as I myself. But each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that.

1Cor. 7:8 But I say to the unmarried and to the widows: It is good for them if they remain even as I am;

1Cor. 7:9 but if they cannot exercise self-control, let them marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

√ Freedom to chose

Paul’s final commentary on the Corinthians questions about God’s view on sex is that he personally wished they’d all follow his example and chose a life of celibacy.

Please note that’s not God’s word to Christians, its Paul’s personal opinion.

His reasoning is that a single person is better able to serve the Lord because they aren’t distracted with their ministry to a spouse and a family (see vs. 32-33).

Also, as we already mentioned the rise in persecution made it a difficult time for believers (vs. 26-27).

But, he understood that most Christians would not follow his example because they were not “gifted” to live a celibate life…

“But each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and another in that.” ~ vs. 7

The reality is that most people are meant to be married!

Celibacy is a gift from God to a select few who have been called by God to life of hardship and dedication that might not be possible for a married person.

But don’t mistake celibacy as somehow more spiritual! For example all the other apostles were married.

The reality is that God’s original plan for human beings involved marriage, thus God said of Adam…

“It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” ~ Gen. 2:18

There are a multitude or reasons why marriage is God’s plan for most of us, but that’s a whole another study!

Here’s the main point of what Paul is writing.

As believers we each have the freedom in Christ to chose whether or not to marry.

We are free to follow the Spirit’s leading and remain single, or to seek a godly spouse.

Both are pleasing to God and neither is more spiritual than the other.

Close

√ Dedicated to sexual purity

As Christians our bodies belong to the Lord, therefore we are called to use them in ways that glorify God.

God has made it abundantly clear that He created sex for people who are in a marriage relationship.

Sex outside of the marriage relationship may provide short-term excitement and pleasure but will never match the blessings that God has reserved for married couples.

Surrender your body to God and you’ll be blessed, disobey His instructions and you won’t be blessed.