1 Corinthians 7:10-16

Bloom where you’re planted ~ in your home

Open your Bible to…

1Cor. 7:24 Brethren, let each one remain with God in that state in which he was called.

Pray

Intro

√ Bloom where you’re planted ~ in the home

In the course of my work as a pastor I talk to…

Singles who want to be married, and married people who wish they were single!

Students who can’t wait to get out of school so that they can start working, and workers who would love to go back to school.

It seems like no matter who we are or what our situation in life that in general very few of us are ever content with our place in life.

Maybe that’s why Paul wrote to Timothy…

“Now godliness with contentment is great gain.”

1 Tim. 6:6

Well here in our text in 1^st Corinthians Paul deals with a number of different issues that his friends had written to him about.

At the root of their questions was a spirit of discontentment.

It seems that Corinthians misinterpreted their new life in Christ as a green light to change or rearrange their physical relationships.

Paul’s counsel to them was to chill and be still, or more accurately…

“Brethren, let each one remain with God in that state in which he was called.” ~ vs. 20 & 24

That is, Paul’s encouragement to his friends at Corinth was to be content in the place where God found them and to learn to bloom where they’d been planted.

Ap. Bloom where you’re planted

We will all face times in our lives when we feel like we’re on a Hamster wheel running with all our strength and yet getting absolutely no where.

Feel like we’ll never graduate so we’re tempted to drop out of school and just get any job rather than the one you really want.

Frustrated with a houseful of children who seem to always need something so you’re tempted to bail on motherhood and pursue your “own life”.

Hit a dry spell in ministry where it’s hard to find any good fruit from all your work and you wonder whether or not you’re even called to serve the Lord.

It’s in those times that we need to take to heart the Lord’s admonition to stick with our calling and learn to make the very best of the situation for the Lord’s glory…

Take a long term perspective and evaluate your present situation in light of where God will have you 5, 10, or 20 years from now.

That perspective will give you the strength and endurance to stick with your calling and to see it through to harvest time.

…that’s what it means to “bloom where you’re planted.”

Married to a Believer (vs. 10-11)

1Cor. 7:10 Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord: A wife is not to depart from her husband.

1Cor. 7:11 But even if she does depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband. And a husband is not to divorce his wife.

√ Married to a believer

The next question that the Corinthians were concerned about was marriage and divorce.

Especially in view of Paul’s previous commentary on the superiority of a celibate life.

Wouldn’t it be better they might reason to divorce so that a man and woman could focus their attention on the work of the Lord!?

Or, now that they were born again and a new creation in Christ weren’t they free to pursue God’s will even if it meant leaving their spouse?

Note Paul’s answer, it’s short and simple…

“A wife is not to depart from her husband.” Vs. 10

And…

“And a husband is not to divorce his wife.” ~ vs. 11

Pretty straight forward!

In other words this is a question that has a black and white answer.

No gray areas of interpretation.

Simply, no divorce.

Paul reminds his friends at Corinth that the Lord had already addressed this issue during His earthly ministry, thus he writes…

“Now to the married I command, yet not I but the Lord.” ~ vs. 10

For example, in Matthew 19:3-10 & Mark 10:6-9 Jesus said…

Mark 10:6 But from the beginning of the creation, God “made them male and female.’

Mark 10:7 “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife,

Mark 10:8 and the two shall become one flesh’; so then they are no longer two, but one flesh.

Mark 10:9 Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”

So, Paul tells Christian couples that they were to stay together and look for opportunities to bloom in their marriage relationship for Christ’s glory!

Ex. Problems in the marriage

So, if a Christian couple is facing marriage problems the Bible tells us that they should always seek to reconcile their relationship rather than dissolve it for that is God’s will.

Additional motivation for working through problems in a marriage is that each person will grow in their Christ-likeness as they learn to acknowledge their own contribution to the problems and make the changes necessary to alleviate those issues.

By working through issues a Christian couple provides a witness of true agape love to the community in which they live.

Bottom line is that God’s will as Paul writes, and as Jesus Himself confirmed is that His children were to honor their marriage vows.

Ap. God’s perfect will

First let me just say that divorce is not the unforgiveable sin!

Christians are not perfect people and often times fail to live up to God’s perfect will for their lives.

So, if you’re divorced and remarried or plan to remarry God can and certainly desires to help you make your next marriage a lasting one!

So don’t get under a burden of condemnation!

Having said that I do want to encourage you to heed the Lord’s instructions from this point forward by choosing to make your marriage permanent. Here are some practical points to help you create a lasting marriage relationship…

Commit yourself to protecting and developing your marriage.

Chose as a couple to make your marriage a safe haven where you can count on one another to be there for each another no matter what!

Never use the word divorce in your conversations and never look at it as an option.

Remember that divorce never fixes anything.

Pray together every day!

You’ll be blessed if you work to reconcile your problems rather than dissolving your marriage through a divorce.

Ex. Divorce takes health toll

Recent study reported in the Journal of Health and Social Behavior found that…

Divorced people have 20% more chronic health problems.

Marriage provides physical and mental health benefits.

Trauma of divorce is detrimental to one’s physical health and mental wellbeing (not to mention financial health).

Those who remarry do gain back some of the benefits of marriage ~ but not all.

Once more we find that new scientific discoveries are really just old truths of God that we’ve forgotten or ignored.

Married to an Unbeliever (vs. 12-16)

1Cor. 7:12 But to the rest I, not the Lord, say: If any brother has a wife who does not believe, and she is willing to live with him, let him not divorce her.

1Cor. 7:13 And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him.

1Cor. 7:14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy.

1Cor. 7:15 But if the unbeliever departs, let him depart; a brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases. But God has called us to peace.

1Cor. 7:16 For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?

√ Married to an unbeliever

The second question they had regarding marriage concerned what you should do if you’re married to an unbeliever!

Great question!

Fairly common situation in the 1^st Century as the Gospel message was so fresh that people came to faith after they were already married.

But, there were many examples of couples where one person trusted in Christ, but the other did not.

Problem ~ Jesus never said anything about that scenario and there was some controversy as to whether Christians should apply Ezra’s instructions to the Jews to Christian marriages to unbelievers (ref. Ezra 10:11).

So, it’s a gray area for Christians that requires the application of godly wisdom, thus Paul writes…

“But to the rest I, not the Lord, say…” ~ vs. 12

That is, this isn’t a commandment of God, it is the apostles opinion based on the wisdom he had received from the Lord.

So, he counsels them to remain married unless the unbelieving partner wants to dissolve the marriage.

In that case the believer would be under no obligation to keep the marriage together and would free to remarry a believer if they so desired.

Paul then gives two reasons why it would be better to stay put in a marriage to an unbeliever if they are willing to remain…

…so that they might bloom where they were planted.

1) For the benefit of the children ~ vs. 14

“For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband; otherwise your children would be unclean, but now they are holy.”

Paul’s point is that the unbelievers in the house share in God’s blessings because of the presence of the believer.

Ex. Jacob and Joseph

God blessed Jacob’s father in law Laban because of the presence of Jacob.

God blessed the house of Potipher because of Joseph’s presence.

Such would be the case Paul argues in a marriage of a believer to a non-believer…

…so for the sake of the children it would be best to remain married.

Ap. Godly influence

By remaining in the marriage you as a Christian can ensure that your children are raised in a godly environment.

Even if your spouse is a total pagan you get to live your life and witness before your children.

That influence may be the difference that brings them to faith in Christ!

2) For the benefit of the spouse

Another important reason to remain married to an unbeliever is that you’re in a unique place to influence them for Christ, note vs. 16…

“For how do you know, O wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, O husband, whether you will save your wife?”

That is, just because they don’t trust in Jesus today doesn’t mean they won’t at some future point…

…so why would you want a divorce when you are in the best place to win him/her to Christ!

Ex. Peter’s echoes Paul’s instructions

“Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives…”

1 Peter 3:1

So, if the unbelieving spouse wants to remain married to a believer then it is important to honor the marriage vows for the sake of the family.

Bloom where you’re planted so that you can minister to your spouse and children!

On the other hand if the unbeliever doesn’t want to remain married then the Christian spouse is under no obligation to keep the marriage together.

Ex. May have been Paul’s experience!

We know that prior to his conversion that Paul was a Pharisee. Furthermore there is some evidence that he was a member of the Sanhedrin!

Acts 26:10 This I also did in Jerusalem, and many of the saints I shut up in prison, having received authority from the chief priests; and when they were put to death, I cast my vote against them.

The inference is that Paul had a place of authority with regard to the implementation of Jewish law…

…the only body with that authority was the Sanhedrin!

If that was the case then Paul would have had a wife and children as those were requirements of membership!

What happened to them and why aren’t they mentioned?

We can only speculate but many Bible students suggest that Paul’s family did not follow him in his newfound faith in Jesus.

That his wife chose to separate herself from him as she would then consider him a heretic of the Jewish faith.

That would certainly help us to understand why Paul wrote with such conviction and grace regarding those believers who were married to an unbeliever!

Ap. Be careful how you apply this scripture!

Over the years I’ve dealt with a few people who wanted to use this section of scripture as justification for leaving their marriage.

Typically they’re unhappy in their marriage and are looking for some way out.

Rather than acknowledge their own contribution to the problems in the relationship and working toward resolution they try and play the “he’s not a Christian” card.

The sad part is that in almost every case where I’ve encountered this reasoning the couple had been married in a church…

Both active in the church

Both believers by all accounts

Yet, when one or the other wants out suddenly the other partner was “never really a Christian”.

Friends, God knows when we’re playing games and it doesn’t wash with Him.

The bottom line is that in both cases here in our text…

Married to a believer

Married to an unbeliever

The Word of God encourages us to stay together and make the relationship work!

Close

√ Bloom where you’re planted ~ in the home